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"T" is for Thankful - ABC's of Remarriage |

“T” is for Thankful

Thankfulness is probably at the heart of most relationship problems.  More specifically – lack of thankfulness.  It is difficult to be unhappy in a relationship when you are thankful to have it in the first place.

Remarried couples should have an easier time being thankful for their remarriage because they have a failed marriage behind them.  Ironically, we do not seem to have an easier time with it.  Perhaps it is just human nature to be more aware of what others have that we don’t.  Perhaps we are afraid to embrace our remarriage because of our past failures.  The question is: “What do we do about it?”.

If you find yourself looking at the grass on the other side because you think it’s greener, try being thankful that you have grass at all.  Every day make a conscious effort to think of something that you are thankful for in your relationship with your spouse.  If you can’t think of something, ask God to show you something.  Then take that one thing and dwell on it throughout your day.  Why are you thankful for that thing?

Here’s an example:  Let’s say that your choice today, for one thing to be thankful about, is that your spouse has a good sense of humor.  Why are you thankful for it?  Is it because it makes your life fun?  Is it because it relieves stress?  Is it because it makes your kids easier to deal with?  Is it because you don’t have a good sense of humor and you admire that in someone else?  Maybe it’s just because – you don’t know why.  But you’re thinking about it, aren’t you?  Dwell on that item throughout your day.  When did you notice that your spouse had a good sense of humor?  Was there a specific thing that was said?  Was it just something that you noticed in watching your spouse?  You see, if you are keeping your thoughts busy being thankful for something, it is more difficult to be concerned with other things.  After you have spent time thinking about that thing, share your thankfulness with your spouse.  Let them know that you are thankful for it and why.  Lastly, don’t forget to thank God for blessing you with that thing and your relationship.

Just the other day, I was working away at my computer. I was tired, a little irritable, and busy. My husband, who also had a day like mine, came into the room. He didn’t say a word. Instead, he sat at his piano and began to play. It relieved his stress. The music floating around us calmed my nerves. But the smile on my face came when he played a song that he wrote especially for me when we were dating. In the midst of my valley, I was thankful that God had blessed him with that talent.

What are you thankful for in your marriage?

-Loraine Nunley

What tips do you have for being thankful about your marriage? Share with us by commenting on this post.


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