The Importance of Prayer in your Marriage

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Knock, knock

Who’s There?

Lettuce

Lettuce Who?

Lettuce Pray!

Our children love this joke.  What a good reminder for us to pray.  Prayer is very important.  It is the most direct way that we communicate with God.  Prayer strengthens us and it pleases God.  In the Bible, Paul tells us to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17-NKJV).  The Bible is filled with instructions on, not only praying, but how to pray as well.  So God considers this important.

To state it in the simplest of terms, prayer is when we talk to God.  Any good relationship must include good communication.  This includes talking.  So if we want to have a good relationship with God, we work on our prayers (our communication) with Him.  If we want to have a good relationship with our spouse, we work how we talk with one another.

Let’s take this a step further and talk with God jointly.

1. The Bible tells us that “…where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them” Matthew 18:20 (NIV). So if you and your spouse are praying together, God will be there in a powerful way.
2. It is uplifting for us to hear our spouse pray on our behalf.
3. Due to the number of emotions that arise when we are praying, we experience a new level of intimacy together.
4. …you fill in the rest…

Let’s just say that the list of benefits is long.  As prayer makes our relationship with God stronger, our prayer as a couple makes our marriage relationship with God stronger.

So how should we pray as a couple?

One thing to consider is that you are a unique couple with unique personalities. So the way you pray, just like the way you pray individually, will be unique to you and your relationship with God.  If you have not spent time praying as a couple, it may feel awkward the first few times you do it.  But don’t let that stop you, the benefits are definitely worth the initial awkwardness.

This is how my husband and I tend to pray together (although it varies depending on how God’s presence moves us): We find a quiet place (usually our bedroom with the door closed). We hold hands, sitting or kneeling (with age, the kneeling is sometimes a little more difficult, but on those occasions, we know God understands). We decide which one of us speaks first (This is dependent upon how we are feeling, what we are praying about, and how God moves us to speak).  One of us will speak and then we will let the other speak. As you can see there is much room for variation because, let’s face it, when we have conversations with each other, we do not rehearse and repeat things. When we speak with God it should be natural as well. The most important thing is to talk to God just like you are having a conversation with a friend.  It doesn’t need to be (and really shouldn’t be) something that drips with religious symbolism.

What do you say, do you pray with your spouse regularly? If you don’t, will you begin to?

-Loraine Nunley

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